Include, allow and transcend. Not transcend in order to not have.
The attempt to try to transcend something before we have really allowed it it’s place with some compassion and acknowledgement (either imposing that on ourselves or on another) is a common spiritual trap.
We can try to jump too quickly to.. I’ll be the nice person, the bigger person, take the high road, I won’t be needy, I’ll be all those qualities that make me so kind and so zen…
and yet all the while are we really being honest and loving toward the truth of how we’re feeling?
There can be a whole big ignored/unconscious current alive and well underneath that is anything but zen.
Be aware of spirituality becoming another way to measure yourself; forming a spiritual ego.
We need to learn that all emotions are included in being spiritual, and that it is more about learning to be authentic, honest, true and compassionate with all of our human stuff.
That is more of a spiritual maturity than adhering to some idea of what it means to be beyond that, unaffected or enlightened.