We can try to figure things out in our mind to feel like we have some sense of controlling life. We are often way ahead of ourselves in this, and not connected to reality.
Sure it works and is important for pragmatic planning and simple things, but for the inner things and the feelings and the relationships, we are not going to know until it unfolds and is alive and revealing itself to us in the moment.
Trust yourself enough to explore and find out.
Allow life to show you.