Author: ratnadyer

Often we see how we want things in our relationships to be different. We also sometimes need to learn to listen and focus more appreciation for each other for the ways we do show our love.

The way we show love can be different for each of us. The way we want to be shown love is not necessarily the language our partner speaks.

In a healthy relationship, love is better able to be received when there is respect, allowing, acceptance and trust in what is, rather than conditions and a hankering after how we think it should be.

When our mind is working on overdrive: analysing, calculating, thinking, doubting, questioning, arguing, re-hashing, re-playing, allocating blame, considering all the factors over and over again…

and yet no matter how much thinking we do we can’t find the ‘right way’, the solution or the answer…

Realise that clarity can’t come without space and relaxation for it to reveal itself to us.

We need to slow right down.
We need to come into our body and out of our head.
We need to notice we are breathing.
We need to calm and centre our nervous system.
We need to allow simplicity to share its joy.
We need to connect and listen to our deep heart.
We need to trust the silence.

True heart clarity is not accessible through more thinking. It is available on a deeper/higher level of conscious awareness to the level of thinking.

Dropping into body, allowing emotions to move through, listening to that which is unmoving, we can connect in with inner stillness.

Here, self doubt does not exist. The clarity you seek sits in this silence.

When we walk consciously, with connection to the earth, we feel the sacredness present wherever we are.

Our physical senses keep us anchored in the real. Use them to respond to life from your aliveness to the moment, rather than your thoughts about things.

Love has flow and freedom, allowing and celebration, independence with sharing and togetherness.

Attachment brings fear of loss, betrayal, abandonment and rejection.
Attachment generates need, clinging, grasping/aversion, expectations, power and control struggles.

I don’t know that as humans we are able to have a close, truely connected relationship without having attachment. In my experience they come hand in hand.

It’s not that attachment is bad, in fact it is part of our greatest teacher, as the more attached we are, the more we become reflected with our fears.

And ultimately we are on a journey to learn to release our fear. So it’s all designed perfectly, to help us become aware.

It can just be so hard to trust at times, and to learn to know the difference between love and attachment and to find an inner balance where we can suffer less from our own fears.

Not for the faint hearted.

Part of finding balance can sometimes be to learn to do less and to allow life to show you.

The river keeps flowing whether you’re rowing or not.

It is an art to trust life.

Be love, be peace. It is not something outside us. It is a place within. It is a graceful feeling. It is a blessing to share and walk and live life from this space.

It’s not much good to talk about love and peace if we are not demonstrating it.

Love and peace also includes the authenticity of saying a respectful no when you need to.

Today I cleaned my kitchen.

I have recently taken to doing yoga in the kitchen, as it’s the only wooden floor area big enough, and yoga is oh soooo much better on a wooden floor 🤸🏻‍♀️🧘🏼‍♀️

One thing about yoga is that you see different perspectives and angles in a room than usual. You see the floor close up, the ceiling, and the underside and close up of furniture 😜

And so in the last weeks I have increasingly noticed the fly poo here there and everywhere!.. the marks and stains that build up over time on white cupboards, the filth under the stove and on the stove front etc etc etc.

The analogy came through loud and clear, as after I had started cleaning I kept seeing more and more muck:

The process of cleaning up involves realising how much of a mess things are.

This is also true for the process of gaining self awareness and cleaning up our ‘stuff’. For a while it seems there is just more and more of it as you start to look, and it can feel sometimes overwhelming and hard to grapple with.

However one step at a time things improve.

And at the end of the day, you’re happy with your kitchen 😂🤩🥳🤸🏻‍♀️

Focus on living from a place of heart, a way of being that you value. Creating what you value. Being honest, true and real.

Life is too short to be living a lie or focusing on all the things you don’t like.

Make the most of every moment, to be walking with and toward things you love.

We all start somewhere on our path of healing. And in order to have something of an understanding about the healing journey, we need to be walking it.
There is no one I have ever met that hasn’t been propelled towards healing without experiencing it’s contrast.

Healing starts from some form of wounding. Otherwise why would we need to heal.

And yes we do heal, we change, we grow, and at the same time this does not mean that the wound is absolutely fixed and gone.

It more means that our wounding has taught us the absolute need to have to find our way and to be more gentle inside. It helps us discover the need for more acceptance and compassion and to cultivate patience and trust in the process.

We can’t get rid of our wounding, but we can learn to have a spacious and loving relationship with it.

Our vulnerability continues to keep us humble, open and kind, learning and growing.

There is no such thing as an unwounded healer.