Author: ratnadyer

There’s a part of me that’s scared. And yet a quietness inside that can see her fear, is not inside it and knows all is well.

Often we try to push feeling fear away. Our running from it makes it hang out longer in the shadows, not fully gone.

It will pass more quickly and fully if we first allow it to be there. Then name it. See it. And see that we are also more than it.

Rather than saying:
‘I am afraid’
say:
‘I have fear happening within me right now. I can see it.’

This is a slight shift in language, but an important shift in consciousness.

Maybe when the fear has subsided more, become curious.. take a look by asking who is it in me that gets afraid?

The very act of looking at the fearful part shows that you are not inside the fear. You must be also outside the fear to be able to view it.

This goes for any emotion.

When shed, in time they wash all clean.

‘Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding’. – Khalil Gibran.

Let yourself break open.

It’s not the thing that changes, it’s the lens we’re looking through.

Don’t always believe the way you are thinking about things. One day it’s one way the next day we see it differently.

Learn to hold space around your thoughts and feelings, to listen to the context within which they pass through.

May we all walk the path of truth and be aligned with the compass of our heart.

And say it clearly.

If you are following the truth of your heart then it cannot be that it is wrong for the other person. Even when they may not like it.

When our hearts are open and full we are no longer having to avoid any feeling. This is joy.

I just enjoyed crying my eyes out to a heartfelt film, watching the pains, triumphs and growth of being human.

Love as genuine presence.
Love as deep listening.
Love as sincerity of heart.
Love as absolute integrity and authenticity.
Love as undivided conscious attention.
Love as honesty.
Love as the client’s choice in coming to be to give support and consciousness to oneself.
Love as compassion.
Love as truth.
Love as non-judgement.
Love as acceptance and trust.
Love as true caring.
Love as simply being there.

It’s not rocket science.

That the struggle within where you’re at continues the way it is, or that you will not know who you are or how to be without it?

So often we cling to our known patterns even when they are not working for us. We fear letting go into a place of not knowing.

Learn to lean into not knowing and to stay there for a while bit by bit.

The universe functioned for millions of years without us, so something knows for us and we can practice to hand it over.

We weren’t in control of our conception, our birth, our body’s functioning, the weather, and we’re not in control of when it is our turn to leave our body.

Learning to live in surrender and not resist change.

Often there is a part of us that yearns to trust and feel safe in our relationships, and yet another part fears that if I really fully trust I will be vulnerable to loss, being let down, betrayed, rejected, abandoned or abused.

We can be caught in wanting to let others in, but not wanting to allow them too far in, to really matter, because then they will then have the power to hurt us.

We often try out all the options.. unconsciously… Maybe I can find a way to be in but have one foot out. Like.. I’ll be there, but not there; often unavailable through work or addictions or keeping a wall around my inner heart.

Or in the other direction: maybe I’ll make the other person the most important thing in my life and be the one to do everything to make it work so they won’t leave me.

In the end these attempts to keep ourself safe are often the very thing that lead to the rejection or betrayal, as the other feels there’s too much pressure to be your everything or they get sick of being less important than your job.

It is important to realise that trust is also about relationship to our self; about coming back to our own sense of being and listening and deep knowing that in truth all is well, I am safe, I am learning, I am whole no matter what and life is looking after me, even when I can’t see it. Trust is learning to lean into that.

When we learn to trust in our self this way, our trust in relationships will improve.

Life isn’t designed to give you what you want. Life is designed to make you find yourself.

People want the external first.. When such and such happens, then I’ll be happy.
It doesn’t work like that. Because when we get that thing, its not long before we are looking to the next. Our mental process hasn’t changed.

Happiness comes from attending to the inside. Turn it around.. when I am connected with my Self, when my heart is open and I feel grateful with all I have, I naturally attract good things.